It was a nice affair. My boss (fifteen years my senior) is a cardiologist, scientist, mother, and today Professor of Medicine. They gave her an endowed chair..... with all of the pomp and circumstance. There was a medal, a big one, that she wore around her neck as she gave her lecture.The chancellor of the university, dean of medical school, chairman of medicine all said that she is an amazing scientist. They had her mother, father, brother, sister, husband, son and daughter stand up. They all were in the audience. For her introduction, "When a brilliant mind meets excellence in education and enthusiasm for discovery........"
It all-together was surreal. In surroundings familiar, I felt like an outsider.... being away for almost two months. Her accolades seemed to belong to a giant. For a moment seeming more like a coronation than lecture. Today she is the star. Somehow managing to find her way atop a pile of ego-centric, contemptuous, impatient, gender-biased men.
Surreal because I know this woman. I have been known to curse her. When she returns my writing nearly all red with edits, sends me back to the bench feeling my questions were ridiculously stupid, chastises me for spending too much time with patients and casually suggests I should repeat the experiment over the weekend.
But she is also the woman who hand-delivered home cooked meal to my house after my surgery.
What a challenge to be a successful woman. Here I am a critic, sitting in the privileged position to advance under her tutelage. Perhaps it reflects my own struggle. To find the right balance between kick-ass cardiologist, healthy/ fit athlete, and caring thoughtful friend.
A love hate relationship with the Professor. A love hate relationship with myself?
1 comment:
I had a relationship similar to this several times over. Once in my undergraduate career with a female lecturer (I thought her published poetry was terrible, now I love it!) and then with my mentor teacher when student teaching during my Masters. I think, part of it, is the need to be the dominant female. Whenever there is a successful female in my life, I either end up hating her or befriending her, or hating her then befriending her. I don't know if this is healthy/normal or not. I should do some reading in this area. (Summer project #16).
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